Sweet dreams are made of these, who am I to disagree?…

So I had this really weird dream last night. I often dream that Kyle and I live in the apartments I grew up in. Well, what is weird is every time I have this kind of a dream we are walking around the complex, but it is always dark outside. This time I came across this huge pile of soil with a hole next to it with something slightly buried. I felt a twinge in my heart and uncovered it to find a maxwell coffee house can(the kind of coffee my dad drinks). I brushed off the dirt and opened it up. Inside were old papers and things I had collected from my job at PetCo.

I don’t ever wanna feel like I did that day, take me to the place I love, take me all the way

How I hate you so….But really, it’s probably me being ignorant. Still, I don’t remember it being this much of an asshole to me. Is it that, or is it the fact that NO ONE has hardly any information/tutorials on it anymore. Nor will anyone answer my posted questions. Grrr. Oh well, I’m figuring it out slowly but surely. I’m going to ask tomorrow why my images folder for my joined isn’t working. Even though it’s directed and chmoded properly. More work on it tomorrow, time for sleeps now. I have work from 7p-2a tomorrow as well. Hopefully I wake up at some sort of a decent hour so I have some play time before work.

You used to run me away, All while laughing. Then cry about that fact, ’til I returned. Lets see if I can remember to do that every post.

So I added the Ask Me! script. I didn’t want to fool with trying to embed it in WordPress so I just did it on its own pages. It is now located in the header on every page above my information. =] I also edited the links below that information so that it wasn’t all messed up anymore and added my iPod. I’m hoping soon to figure out my enthusiast. I never remember enthusiast being that much of a pain in my ass.

So I just checked the surprise me button on my personal settings. I’m not sure what it is supposed to do yet. No one will/is able to spill the beans. I will find out one way or another.

So Kyle’s birthday was yesterday. He turned 27! We had steaks, mashed potatoes, ice cream cake, cake, and went out to Boondoggles to drink. =D I made the ice cream cake, well, it’s kinda just ice cream and oreos. LOL! It’s still delicious. Our car is now fixed for his birthday and he got $100. The previous day Casey took us out to eat at 888. Delicious!

Hopefully soon we’ll get an apartment so we don’t have to live here anymore. I’m seriously depressed. It sucks. I hate feeling like this. I miss my family. I need to get a place up there but it is sooo damned expensive.

Just run away. As fast as you can. Don’t look back. Don’t care anymore. Forget what keeps you unhappy. Let go of what is holding you back. Bury what hurts deep inside, never back down. Never let anyone in. Trust only your blood and heart. Sleep forever and forget the pain. Know your every move. Know your every word. Stay sincere, stay blunt, don’t allow the feelings of others to sway you. Keep away and know every detail. Never let your senses fail you.

We moved in around the fourth. I think we’ve got the room how we want it, my problem is it seems like we dodn’t have enough room, for furniture at least. It has plently of storage. I’ve been working a lot. I worked at the Pasadena PetCo store last week Wednesday and Thursday. It was fun helping remodel the store. While I was there I saw they had a veiled male chameleon. He’s a good 13 inches long or more. Unfortunaltly he was stuffed in a tiny 10 gallon terrarium, he also has metabolic bone disease. I bought him so I could help him. He’s looking better already. I’ve fed him 8 crickets and 8 superworms all dusted.

My birthday went well. I got to go to Moody Gardens two days in a row. It was really pretty and I had a great time. We’re going to try and get a membership. I still haven’t gotten my camera yet. I’m hoping Kyle and my Mom will go in together on it.

Yesterday we had our internet, cable and phone set up. The internet is lightning fast. My ethernet card isn’t working, and my mouse and keyboard keep trying to go out. Going to try and work on my iPhone and fix the music and what not. It erased all my music last time and I want to buy a few apps. Ciao.

The past couple of days have been utter chaos. We got a car, the only reason it didn’t pass inspection was because the left blinker in the dashboard didn’t turn on and when you put the emergency brake down the light doesn’t go off.

The family dog got lost and was hit by a car. My tax return still hasn’t come in and kyle’s missing check still hasn’t come in. I also may get fired. Kyle and I also got into a really bad fight, all my stuff is packed. A positive view on the passed couple of days? I got to hang out with my bestie Raven and Travis is home for four days. We’ll be moved out by June 4th. YAY! My birthday is in nearly two weeks. I can’t believe a year went by that fast. *sigh* I guess my next step is either to save up money for tuition or beg mom to finish the FAFSA form.

I wish we had internet, this only on th phone crap is irritating. Not having decent A/C is irritating, too. Time to save money again!

Hank Williams, JR. – Family Tradition

I’ve been thinking about Virginia more and more lately. How may be I should just move back until I finish school. I’m sick of the chaos here. It feels as if everytime I turn around something else happens. Plus, I miss my family. I’m going to talk to Kyle tonight. I know he is weary of me mentioning the subject. I feel if I go back mom would help me get a car. Not only for her benefit to have a job, but so I may as well and go back to school.

I also know that Kyke wouldn’t go back with me. We would still be together, but he would wait for me to finish school so I could come back. This is such a big decision… I’m so confused as to where to go. Virginia seems like the best idea. *sigh* Sometimes I wish I was more happy here. I think the main problem is that I see everyone else getting on their feet & getting their own place with their significant other and we’re still sitting here with our thumbs up our asses. Maybe I’ll have some sort of breakthrough.

It takes time, healing wounds. I miss her…a lot. There’s a hole in my heart. A lot has been going on recently. The only Internet I have is on the phone. We’ll be moving soon so we haven’t gotten it here anymore. We’re getting a car tomorrow (knock on wood). It’s a standard though, I don’t know how to drive a standard, yet. This oughtta be fun. Lol.

I can’t wait to be able to have Internet again, I have so many pictures I need to upload. I did a little crafty project the other day. I made bottle caps into magnets. Kyle’s mom also helped me clean the room. It’s beautiful. If the A/C upstairs worked I’d be up there all the time. I have to finish the rest of the laundry and pack up the room. We should be out of here soon. I guess in the meantime I could work not only on the room, but my artwork and redo my house plans.

I have to go get Kyle from work soon.

Our baby Emmie. We’ll always love & remember you. 5-16-10 <3